Title: When All You See Is Death
Fandom: BBC Sherlock tosin kai sen voi muualleki sijottaa.
Pairing: Sherlock/John
Rating: K-11
Genres: drama, romance, hurt/comfort
Vastuuvapaus: No en omista, hahmot on Conan Doylen, versio BBC:n ja tyyppien
Summary: Sherlock sees the worst in everything. Until.
A/N: Innostuin kirjottaan ees jotain.
When All You See Is Death
London makes him wonder. It's busy and flowing and there are so many people there, living their lives who don't see all the dangers around them. He does.
(That man is carrying a gun, that woman knows how to defend herself, that girl has strangled her brother because she was jealous, that boy is looking for a knife.)
He speeds up and tries to cut it all out, walks into a café and orders a double espresso. The lady smiles at him and he tries to smile back but all he sees is the glint in her eyes and the recognition.
He leaves before he gets his coffee.
**
When John hears Sherlock telling him his life, he wonders how hard it must be living knowing all the time. He asks about it later, and the look on Sherlock's face lets him know it's even harder.
They don't discuss it.
**
When he connects all the dots, he forgets. It's all he can do to forget and he smiles.
He knows everyone thinks he's insane, he gets off on the cases. It's just so relaxing, he sees the dots and makes the connections. He doesn't have to see the ugliness around. The people around him, the dangers.
The drugs never worked quite as well. Sometimes they even made it worse.
He wonders how John doesn't make him feel threatened. Even though he knows the other man could kill him in a split second with his gun.
**
John starts seeing what Sherlock sees. Starts understanding. And he lets it slip that he thinks Sherlock has panic attacks. Or something else.
They don't talk for two days.
**
After what he calls The Episode in his head, he listens to John. He trusts and it's so weird. And he goes out, still seeing it all but somehow he's much calmer.
(But John is at his side and John won't let anything happen to him, not ever. He wonders why he's so sure when they haven't even known each other for that long.)
**
John wonders if Sherlock sees the change in him. From the good doctor to a love smitten kitten. He helps Sherlock get through everyday life. He never complains when Sherlock wakes him in the middle of the night (sometimes it's a touch, sometimes feathers, sometimes shouting) and drags around town.
He kind of likes it all. And wishes Sherlock would see it.
**
When he first notices a change in tone, he's just coming back from a walk. He saw a girl kicking a puppy and he asked her to stop it.
(It never happened and he felt crazy beyond anything and there were noises and he had to concentrate on the thought of John to come back.)
He starts observing everything that is John Watson afterwards. Everything points to something he knows from others. Something he's never experienced.
**
John has to agree with Sherlock on the fact that sometimes, he's a bit dim. But so is Sherlock.
When they kiss the first time, it's Sherlock who begins it and it's warm. And makes John light-headed.
They don't really talk about it. They just let it go from there.
**
He thinks London is very interesting, indeed. And he thinks how all those people that go around see so little.
(That man has flowers for his wife he's loved for years and who's never cheated on him, that woman is finally getting the job of her dreams, that girl just passed an exam she thought she wouldn't, that boy is smiling because he got an ice cream.)
He sees John by his side and he smiles.
**
John still worries about Sherlock. But he knows it's all going better. He wonders about the three little words and whether they'd change things.
They never say them but they know it already.
